This Monday is worse than any other Monday this year. At least, so far. Why? Because it's the Monday after a long holiday weekend. A long, fourth of July holiday weekend. A very hot weekend.
And although I'm trying to be positive today even though I have to work (unlike some people...*cough*), I'm struggling with my presence on this here blog. Now, don't get me wrong, I love this space and still enjoy blogging and all that goes along with it! However, I realized that I lost a part of myself when I created this new space.
I'm no longer a newlywed blogger, or a blogger that posts about her husband and their lovey-dovey marriage and date nights. But, that's all I knew before. Blogging in that phase of my life was easy. It came easily and I hardly struggled with new blog post ideas or fun things to do. But now? It's all different. I knew that my life would change drastically, but I guess I underestimated the change that would come along with my blogging life. Don't get me wrong, I'm still going to do it and will get better at it *fingers crossed!*, but I've just got to figure out what exactly that means for me. It's a whole new life and uncharted territory for me, so it's going to take some time to figure out.
Personally, I'm doing pretty well, considering. I'm having fun and am living life for ME, which is pretty great! I don't have anyone to answer to and I can do what I want when I want. I'm not saying it's 'better', but it's something that I am holding on to.
I'm really looking forward to seeing where this blog will go and the direction my life will take from here. I guess until then, this blog will be a whole lot of random, much like my life right now. And hey, what's so wrong with that?! I'm emotional some days, and therefore, so will my blog posts. And some days, I'm actually pretty happy and loving the freedom and fun that I'm experiencing, so my posts will be fun and free. I have complete freedom over it, but the control-freak in me is struggling with not knowing what to post or when to post it, what to feel or when to feel it, and what to share and when to share it. But for now, that's okay, because I'M OKAY, and that's pretty fantastic.