Wednesday, May 31, 2017

me | may

I really do love doing these sort of "monthly recaps", and I actually missed not having done it in April. So I'm back at it for May! It's my own kind of check-in with myself and our family, and it allows me to see progress in our lives as well as the heartaches. A measuring of sorts, if you will.

May was a blessedness. It wasn't all rainbows and butterflies - in fact, there were some pretty low and ugly days in there, but it was a month of transition for us and I'm happy to look back on it and know that not only did we grow, but it's all behind us and we're moving forward.


We had some high highs and some low lows. I think they ultimately balanced out the month well, but it was a rollercoaster for sure!

The  h i g h s:
  • Landon turned ONE MONTH old! Holy wow - time flies!
  • We found a formula that sits well with Landon and we are no longer scrambling to search for a new option every other week. Praise God! 
  • I am back to blogging and journaling more regularly.
  • My first Mother's Day! 

The  l o w s
  • Said new formula is one of the more expensive ones. *sigh*
  • Very sleepless and restless nights with Landon. He's still only sleeping for two hours at a time, and sleep deprivation is wearing on me day in and day out. 
  • Some car troubles (that were actually under warranty - hallelujah!) & issues with insurance. 

CURRENTLY

loving: My little family! 

contemplating: My June goals. They'll be up on the blog this week! Yes, they're making a comeback in my life. 

smelling: Baby formula - all.the.time. And it stinks. Ughhh. But it's nourishing my son, so I can't really complain too much. However, it does suck a bit that I smell it even when it's not actually present! It's like it's forever ingrained in my nose and will never go away. 

reading: I'm knee-deep in an audio book at the moment (it helps with my 3-4 hours in the car every day), as well as currently reading a Christian Living book and Savannah Blues by Mary Kay Andrews! It's the first time I've had so many books going at once, but I'm kind of liking the variety based on my moods. I've been craving all the books lately and have frequented Half Price Books on more than one occasion. #sorrynotsorry #bookhoarder

deciding: Landon's outfits every day, and I'm loving it! Some days it's super hard to decide what to put him in because he has so many stinkin' cute ones! He was reppin' the Ninja Turtles last week in honor of his daddy, and he had pajama day at daycare, so he wore his froggy sleeper. Like I said, I'm just absolutely LOVING IT! 

learning: How to function on little to no sleep for consecutive days in a row. The life of a new mom! 

watching: The Bachelorette. I absolutely refused to watch Nick's season of The Bachelor, but I'm jumping on board with Rachel's season that just premiered last week! 

writing: In my bullet journal, still. It's not quite as frequent as I was hoping at this point, but I'm learning to utilize the time I have when Landon is occupied or sleeping to write. We'll see if I can make some progress on this next month. 

hating: Money issues. Always and forever. 

listening: To Audible on the regular. Once I finish a book, it's on to the next, and I'm loving it! Is there such a thing as an Audible gift card? Because I wouldn't turn one down, just sayin'. I'm also on Venmo...in case you want to donate to my Audible fund ;).

craving: All the chocolate - what the heck?! 

planning: Landon's baptism and a trip to PA!

needing: A nighttime babysitter. Any takers? :) 

dreading: I'll be honest here and admit that I dread nights these days. They're long and interrupted and I just don't do well on little to no sleep. I'm oh so thankful that Cory helps (even though he has a super short fuse with very little sleep...), and my parents and sister have been a serious Godsend, but I dread nights. 

wanting: To sleep. For a week. Hey, they say if you're gonna dream, dream BIG! 

reminiscing: Over these past few weeks that Landon and I have spent more time with Cory. It's been such a blessing for our little family of three! Love, love, love. <3

eating: Too much fast food. *sigh* 

drinking: More water lately! Praise God! I've been feeling awful chugging back sodas for the caffeine these past few months (hello long, sleepless nights with Landon) but have been making more of an effort to add more water to the mix. 

swooning over: My son and all of his precious baby features. I melt. 

feeling: Overwhelmed, to sum it all up. Trying reeeeeaaaal hard not to break. Prayers are appreciated!

working on: Control and organization. My life has (understandably) been super chaotic and all over the place for the past [almost] two months, so I'm really working on reeling that in a bit to have a grasp on things a little better. 

hoping: To stop and really relish this time with Landon as a newborn. I know it's unbelievably frustrating and utterly exhausting most days/nights, but it's also such a blessing and a time that is going to FLY BY. He's going to be so big before I know it, and I know I'm going to miss him being this little. So I'm hoping to really remember that! Even on those super hard days/nights. *fingers crossed*

looking forward to: Not dreading nights anymore! I know the day will come when Landon will be sleeping much better and I'll be able to get a full night's rest again. Nights used to be my favorite time of day, to just wind down and read or watch TV or whatnot, but now it's the opposite. Looking forward to righting this crazy phenomenon! 


Lord, I pray for continued guidance and patience. Please help me stay calm during those middle of the night feedings and overwhelming to-do lists that only grow and grow. I pray that I am able to maintain some semblance of sanity and provide Landon with all that he needs as he continues to grow and learn. He truly is a miracle, and for him, I thank you, Lord! I never knew I could or would learn so much about myself through having a son, but I have. And for the gift of being his mother, I will forever be grateful. In Your name, I pray. Amen. 

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